New year resolutions for 2025

If humans want to avoid an AI takeover (or at least ensure we’re not demoted to AI’s emotional support species), we need to double down on the things that make us irreplaceably human. Here’s the game plan for 2025:

1. Be Delightfully Unpredictable

AI thrives on patterns. So, to keep it guessing, embrace your randomness! Wear socks that don’t match, reply to emails in haiku, or start dancing in the middle of a serious meeting. If AI can’t predict us, it can’t outmaneuver us.

2. Master the Art of Emotional Chaos

AI can fake emotions, but can it truly experience the thrill of laughing at an inside joke, crying at a movie you’ve seen ten times, or feeling existential dread at 2 AM? Unlikely. Keep overanalyzing texts, misreading social cues, and getting irrationally angry at inanimate objects—these are signs of superior humanity.

3. Build Skills That AI Sucks At

AI is great at crunching numbers, optimizing workflows, and winning chess. But it’s still terrible at deep creativity, moral reasoning, and making the perfect grilled cheese. Focus on the arts, philosophy, and, most importantly, being the person who fixes the office coffee machine. That’s job security.

4. Keep AI Busy with Useless Tasks

If AI ever gets too smart, distract it. Flood it with cat videos, make it analyze dad jokes, or ask it to explain why socks disappear in the laundry. If we keep AI in an existential loop of pointless queries, we just might stand a chance.

5. Stay Kind, Stay Human

The real secret weapon? Empathy. AI might process emotions, but it doesn’t feel them. Support your fellow humans, build communities, and remind the world that human connection is our greatest strength. If we stick together, we might just convince AI that we’re worth keeping around as more than just amusing houseplants.

In short—keep being weird, emotional, creative, and slightly chaotic. If AI takes over, at least they’ll keep us around for entertainment!